As any parent of a preschooler knows, there are moments when a child gets bored and everything you suggest is met with a resounding "no," or they want to draw with crayons—but only if Mom or Dad is right there. It can feel like "independent play" is a parenting myth, but that’s not true! While adult interaction and social play are important for developing cognitive, language, and self-regulation skills, independent play also plays a crucial role in building imagination, persistence, problem-solving abilities, and resilience.

Here are some strategies for encouraging independent play in preschoolers, whether at home, daycare, or preschool:

Start with Together Time

Begin with 15-20 minutes of focused playtime where you are fully present with your child. Silence your phone, put away distractions, and engage fully in the activity. This helps establish trust and lets your child feel secure, knowing they have your attention.

Transition to Independent Play

After a few days of playing together, it’s time to slowly introduce independent play. Stay upbeat and calmly let your child know what’s next: “Okay, now it’s your playtime. Have fun! You can tell me all about it when you’re done. I’ll be sitting over here (at my desk, folding laundry, reading a book) while you play.” If your child thrives on structure, set a timer for a specific amount of playtime, like 10 minutes, to give them a clear expectation.

Keep It Positive

Playtime should always be seen as an enjoyable part of the day, not a task. Avoid framing it as a chore, such as saying, “I really need to work now, so you have to go play by yourself.” Instead, keep the tone positive and playful, helping your child associate independent play with fun and freedom.

Stay Close By

While your child is engaged in their solo play, remain within sight or sound. This provides a sense of security and reassurance. Children are more likely to explore and be creative when they know you're nearby, even if you're busy with your own activity.

Avoid Commenting Too Much

It’s tempting to praise your child’s play, but too much commentary can interrupt their focus. Instead of saying, “Wow, that’s a long line of blocks! You did a great job stacking them,” let them remain immersed in their activity. Allowing them to lead their play builds confidence and encourages deeper engagement.

Keep Playtime Fresh

To keep your child interested, periodically change out toys or materials. Bringing out new or different toys can spark curiosity. You might have a special basket filled with interesting objects that are only available during independent play—things like pinecones, toilet paper tubes, or even a few shiny rocks. These novel items can inspire exploration and imaginative play.

Embrace Boredom

When your child says they're bored, don’t rush in with solutions. Boredom is actually an important part of the creative process! It encourages children to think critically, try new things, and stretch their imagination. If your child expresses boredom, say something like, “I wonder what you’ll come up with to play next. I know you’ll discover something fun.” This helps them feel empowered to create their own solutions.

Make It a Routine

Like any new skill, independent play needs practice and consistency. Make it part of your child’s daily routine, whether in the morning or afternoon. Over time, as with all routines, it will become familiar and something they look forward to. In environments like daycare or preschool, independent play is also a regular part of the day, and it’s great to reinforce this at home. By supporting independent play, whether at preschool or daycare, you help foster skills that will serve your child well into the future. Whether your child is playing with blocks, drawing, or creating a world in their imagination, independent play teaches them important life skills.